Introspective Narratives
To Dream Again
Fernando Bocanegra
I'm here, right in front of you, but you cannot hear my voice.
I'm here, yet I remain invisible to your eyes.
I listen to your breathing and to the wind drifting through the window, gently moving your hair.
Images appear and fade with every blink. I take a deep breath and, little by little, begin to tune into your frequency once again.
It is just before dawn that you reappear, if only for a few fleeting moments.
Once again, our conversation begins to fade, and no matter how hard I try to remember your words, they slip away.
I return to that moment in the park in autumn, when we met again and walked without hurry, our fingers intertwined.
Sitting on the grass, you smiled as you told me your latest stories. We knew our time together was running out. Then you held my face in your hands and whispered those words of love that would disappear again at dawn.
I know that tomorrow we will meet again in the same place, beside the Crystal Palace, overlooking the lake. This time, we will walk to your home and continue getting to know each other. I will try to write down our words so they won't be lost when I wake.
“When you return to your dream, don't forget to write,” you tell me, with the look of someone who knows something but has no intention of revealing it.
For a moment, I am confused. Which one is reality, and which one is the dream? Am I living two parallel realities?
All I know is that in one, you are here, and in the other, I miss you.
I close my eyes again, hoping to see you once more. Just give me a few more minutes, because I don't know if I'll ever find you again.
The process behind the work
Artist's Notebook
When creating an image for a particular artwork, other photographs often emerge that, somehow, silently call out to me.
This was one of them.
Approximately five months after that production, my instinct led me back to this photograph. There was something about it that held a powerful attraction. For several days, I contemplated it with emotion, yet without finding the words.
Often, in the midst of everyday life, other versions of the reality I am experiencing begin to unfold in my mind. I imagine different paths, decisions I might make, and their possible consequences. Some thoughts are dark, even unsettling; others are filled with love and possibility. Eventually, I return to the moment where I began and quiet my mind.
I have learned to observe these experiences without judgment. They allow me to recognize what I desire, what I would rather avoid, and, above all, what I do not wish to become.
This time, I decided to do something different. Rather than allowing those possibilities to arise spontaneously, I chose to imagine a world inspired by this photograph.
A world that began to come alive in my dreams.